The time change always messes me up. It knocks me off my routine. Before it hit I was struggling to go to bed at the right time, to wake up and get things going. Each day I tried like hell to reset but I was just out of step and I as I failed I gave myself a hard time about it. Which as we know is a tried and true way to improve any situation *she said sarcastically*. I started to look at my routine like an old pair of pants and accepted that maybe it just did not fit me anymore or at least not right now. I needed to let something new settle in that fit and felt good. I thought of something Alan Watts said..

I needed to stop pushing and pulling at the hours of my day. Attempting to control when and how it went down. Instead I laid out my priorities and let my schedule gradually shift on its own. The seasons have changed after all. It makes sense that I would too. I started making my gratitude lists at night before bed time (instead of when I woke up) and then wrote down all the things I wanted to accomplish the next day. This ability - a fluid type of discipline if you will - is something I could never manage before I got sober. Everything was either some kind of hellish chaos burning to simply get through the day or things were dangerously over managed. I was also very attached to the outcome of any given scenario. In other words I was super uptight and very easily disappointed. Which made me dislike myself… and that was mirrored back to me by the people around me. Trying to forcefully get back into my old routine was waking up these old habits. I had to remind myself to be sensitive to the moment. See it as new and unique. Be receptive. Remain open to something new. So if you are struggling right now, feeling out of step, not so productive or less than 100% effective.. give yourself a second, be receptive and find what works for you.

Day 288: Quinoa, stewed apples with turmeric, ginger, cinnamon and golden raisins with coconut cream, pecans, pumpkin seeds and chia. So damn good. I could have this every day and never get sick of it. Just like Alan Watts… I could never in a million years get sick of him. Even from the grave he always knows what’s up.

Apples and quinoa are both really great sources of fiber which - if you have recently quit drinking - is highly effective during the detox process and helps with digestive issues.