A few weeks ago, over dinner a friend was telling me about his day and the nearly heroic amount of things he had accomplished. By comparison my own day nearly felt wasted (duh, that is where comparing yourself to others will get you). Just as I was judging our days side by side in my mind he went on to say that he felt as though he had not gotten enough done and that his tomorrow would be a doozy. I listened for a while, feeling his overwhelm and beginning to make it my own. As he finished verbally plotting the day ahead I reminded him to cut himself some slack. Saying “you can do anything but you can’t do everything”.. and since then these words have been cross stitched on the throw pillows of my mind as gentle little reminders for myself. Sometimes these words honestly comfort me. There are moments though where I become defensive and sometimes I find them to be flat out annoying, rude or some kind of a challenge. I have had too many pots on the stove, if you will. Taking the job out of town threw off my rhythm and put me behind on some other projects. For the last week I have noticed how quickly I become unpresent to the task at hand. Physically doing one thing while my mind is skipping ahead to prep the next item on the list or double back and check on that thing from earlier that was also done with half of my attention. THIS is why we practice mindfulness. So we can draw our selves back into the moment. The place where we are actually living our lives. Without this ability and awareness things can snowball and create feelings of not being enough. It is the very worst feeling and it is madness. The kind of madness that leads people to drinking to take the edge off and “quiet the mind” (as if) rather than listen and pay attention to the present moment without judgement. The day is full of opportunities to practice mindfulness that do not require you to sit down on a tacky cross stitched throw pillow and meditate. I try to apply the practice to things I know I am going to be doing already. You know, like breathing and eating.
I take some deep belly breaths. Through out the day our breath can become quick and shallow. This often leads to sighing.. which is not good for your mental state or the people around you. Sighing is the worn out alarm bells of anxiety, depression, overwhelm and disappointment. Breathe into the corners of yourself to stay in the moment.
Mindful eating. This is where we become nourished and fueled for all the living we have got going on. Eating in the car while maneuvering traffic or doom scrolling on the phone takes us out of one of life’s greatest pleasures. Relax, savor and be grateful for the food on your plate. Breathe deeply. Chew slowly. Enjoy each bite. Bonus: I find that being more aware of what I put in my mouth brings the same awareness to the things that come out of it.
Day 206: Kale, broccoli, bell pepper, celery and scallion sautéed in ghee. Topped with a little tahini, dukkah and a soft boiled egg. Berries on the side.