If you are feeling down..

Here we are - a week into Dry January! I hope you’re all hanging in and feeling ok. I know the news has a lot of people feeling stressed and depressed. Looks like America couldn’t even make it a full week into the new year without another fit of divisive disintegration. We have so much healing that needs to be done. It starts with ourselves. Always. On that note, If you find yourself lacking energy, feeling weak, anxious, depressed, unable to focus or at the mercy of one chaotic mood swing after another - you might have a B vitamin deficiency. Which would make sense if your are newly in recovery. B vitamins are water soluble so, drinking means that once we “break the seal” they all quite literally go down the toilet. Not ideal. Our body does not produce B vitamins so we have to get it from the food we eat or supplements. These MVP’s keep the body energized by converting our food into energy and creating red blood cells which are responsible for carrying oxygen to your muscles. They also ensure that your immune and nervous system are working properly. In fact it is vital in the production of neurotransmitters, especially dopamine, serotonin and GABA. All essential for feeling calm, sleeping well, experiencing pleasure, being happy, ya know - our general well-being.

There are plenty of delicious things you can eat to get all your necessary B vitamins. Leafy greens, eggs, yogurt, salmon, avocado, legumes, bananas, plantains, tofu, pork and chicken breast.. to name a few.

Day 363: Last night I did not sleep so well. My dreams were less than great and I blame it on consuming too much news. I woke up this morning and I just wanted something beautiful. I wasn’t very hungry but if I have learned anything over the past year it is that skipping breakfast means things will get a little dark and bitchy by 2pm. So.. something simple, nourishing and beautiful to balance out all the chaos and negativity from yesterday. Bavarian yogurt, pumpkin seeds, a few raisins, almonds, some toasted pine nuts leftover from last nights dinner, half an apple and a turmeric, honey syrup I whipped up with a little fermented pineapple shrub that I made a while back. So damn good. I could have used a splash of any kombucha but that’s not what was around. Point is - work with what you got. Get creative.

Change

Today my neighborhood is loosing one of it’s farms. Yes, luckily we are blessed with a few but.. this one has been my favorite. Eden.. that’s what they called it. And rightfully so. I walk or ride my bike there two times a week and it has been that way for years. This land fed me through quarantine. The lovely folks who tend to it donated food to a recovery center I worked with. They have been my neighbors and a beautiful part of the culture in this place I call home. Beyond feeding me this farm played a big roll in the early days of my sobriety. Like many of us who quit drinking I found I had more time for hobbies. I bought a camera. A Pentax K100, like the one I had in high school. I took with me to the farm every week for a year. I was newly waking up with sun and the farm was on the same schedule. It was constantly shifting and growing too. In a variety of big and small ways. Some overwhelmingly obvious and others like a rumor. All of it had this rhythm that I needed to reconnect with. I was so out of touch with myself. I needed sun and dirt. I needed to witness things get dug up to make room for new crops. New seasons. I needed to be reminded that everything eventually becomes compost. How the ease of the morning sun becomes relentlessly bright, wilting everything in its path before it stretches out and breaks into shadows around rush hour. The process and evolution of it all was something I had forgotten. but could relate to. In a very grounded and natural way. Bringing my camera along helped me remember that there is always another perspective. I am so grateful for these photos now. Not simply because soon that land will have yet another condo building on it.. but because they remind me how beautiful change can be despite how challenging and uncomfortable it tends to feel in the moment. I will miss the convenience and the energy if the farm but I’m comforted in knowing that they are not done. They are simply moving to a new space. I hope their new neighbors appreciate them as much as I have.

Here are some favorites from that year. I shot black white film almost exclusively at the time and I think it was because so much of me wanted the world to be simple like that. If you’d like to see more shots from the farm or if you want to see some other places I wandered around aimlessly with my camera they can be found here.

Day 185: Scrambled eggs with pesto and Parmesan.. with my attempt at a gluten free savory zucchini bread… was it the worst thing I’ve ever made? No. But It was dry enough to have me worried that I might choke to death alone in my apartment and become a statistic. So thumbs down on this experiment.

We’re half way there!

Alright guys, I want you all to take a second and sing the chorus of Bon Jovi’s Living on a Prayer with me because we are officially half way through a year of breakfasts here at Naked and Eggs! This project has been such a fun and nourishing way to make sure that I am taking care of me first. If you are someone who is prone to prioritizing others needs above your own I highly suggest you carve out some non-negotiable time in the morning just for you. Every day.. And put a egg on it! Wake up, look in the mirror and ask yourself how you feel and what you want. Going into each day knowing what you want saves time. I have also noticed that creates less space in your life for other people who do not know what they want. What a gift! So today I am feeling accomplished and I want EGGS and Bon Jovi on blast! 182 days down.. 182 day to go!

P.S. I am 100% positive that if I had not been sober this entire time I would have given up on this project long ago.. I would have woken up feeling like steaming trash and not had the energy or desire to make myself something beautiful to eat. I would have ordered a taco (outsourcing my self care) and eaten it in bed… I do not miss that.

Day 182: Cheesy egg with sautéed kale, potatoes, bell pepper, shi-shi’s (shishito peppers) scallions and tomato confit. Berries on the side.

DID YOU KNOW… Blueberries have the ability to control the release of cortisol in your body? That is the stress hormone that is produced by the adrenal gland during stressful moments. It travels to the hippocampus and unleashes an emotional response (aka potential freak out). Blueberries help in controlling this hormones impact on your mood. Keeping you calm and relaxed. So eat up!

Hued

I dreamt in black and white last night. I can’t recall that ever happening before. I woke up craving all the colors. I ate then spent part of the morning painting and listening to old Alan Watts lectures. I love him so much. His voice thrills me. If I could have a second voice in my head it would be Alan’s. His wisdom and perspective are wonderful but the moments when he cracks himself up are the very best. The lecture below seems timely.

Day 101: Salad for breakfast. Quinoa, spinach, carrots scallions, radish, avocado, blueberries and kimchi with lemon and amino acids.